Memories: Reinforcing gratitude
Using memories to remain positive and be grateful for the life you have.
Many of us spend time in the past. Nostalgia plays a role in how we think, feel and come to decisions. For some, memories provide a valuable window into what makes us who we are and form part of our character.
For those living a second life or dealing with starting again, memories can also be an anchor. A weighty reminder about what was previously possible and is now isn’t, or a solemn glimpse into situations loved and lost.
No one can look back without some regret or disappointment at their entire life, and that’s not the point.
The point is to create a consistent stream of positive memories that help reinforce a grateful state of mind.
Putting memory reinforcement into practice
1. Remind yourself that you’re alive
This may seem out there. But every day you wake up is another chance to make positive memories for you and those around you. Tell yourself this irefutable fact.
2. Make plans
I talk a lot about making plans. Please do.
There is not enough time to keep putting things off. Book the show, take the trip, call the friend. To coin a phrase, ‘Just do it. ’
3. Delete the nonsense
Another phrase I use a lot.
Every day, annoying, small, nonsensical things try to get in the way of positive experiences—queues at airports, rude people, delays, blisters and external stray bullets from colleagues or friends.
Please delete them from your mind.
They don’t need to get in the way of the main reason you are doing what you're doing. Enjoy and appreciate what you went for!
Find the joy in Life
Why did you decide to do what you are doing? Is it sightseeing? Is it retail therapy? Is it just sitting outside in the park?
You chose to do this with presumably some expectation. Whether it lives up to that expectation or exceeds it, try and find the positive in what you are doing.
You are in a privileged position to be able to make this choice. It’s your life, and it’s worth living every second in appreciation of it.
Look around you - what do you see? Life is everywhere in all its forms.
Take note of what humans have achieved. It is in your DNA to achieve things whilst you are here.
Feel the atmosphere - the weather is a reminder of our natural surroundings. This is real life and existence in all its diversity, hot, cold, wet and dry all make us feel a certain way. Embrace the changing of your bodily feelings
You’re a survivor, a winner in a brutal game. Remember that you are winning.
Make memories every day
Your memory building doesn’t have to always consist of grand plans.
There is joy in many things. Check out this wonderful book for something to dip in and out of as a timely reminder when feeling uninspired. It could just be that morning coffee outside or a walk in the rain. Maybe the way your favourite song makes you feel at the gym or your kids’ laughter.
When you get that feeling, that unmistakable feeling of contentment and happiness, log that firmly in your mind. Timestamp it as best you can! If it's a place or a thing, take a photo or a video.
Be grateful you have found this moment. It is what we should live for. Nothing else matters right now, you are alive!
Carry the gratitude with you
I try extremely hard to carry my gratitude from one scenario to another.
The game of padel, which I didn’t think I’d ever be able to play, leaves me exhausted but happy. When I get home, this happiness is projected onto my family, which in turn makes me enormously grateful for everything I have, knowing it came close to being all over for all of us.
I try every day to make a positive memory from one situation to another.
It's not always easy. But you can make memories worth keeping every day.
Link them together, and you create an unbreakable chain of positivity that you can cling to through life.
Remain grateful: Wrapping things up.
Your life is yours to live, and it is a privilege.
Don’t sweat the small stuff, delete the nonsense.
Make and keep memories, don’t let them pass you by.
Carry the feeling from one experience to another.
Never say die.
Oli
